Hopeless
by DemonRyu
Summary: Love is hopeless. But sometimes, it might just convince someone to stay when they wish to leave. (SeiferSelphie)


_No more blame I am destined to keep you sane  
Gotta rescue the flame  
Gotta rescue the flame in your heart_

Seifer rested his arm against the glass, watching someone in the courtyard below. She was dressed in sunshine yellow, dancing to a song only she could hear, one hand gripping the brim of the hat atop her head. A storm was coming in and she'd wanted a chance to dance in the breeze before the rain started to fall. From what he could tell, the wind was beginning to pick up. In a minute, he'd go out and tell her to come inside.

It was funny how in just a month, their roles had reversed. Before, Selphie would be the one to go after him, laughing and warning him to be careful. And to listen to Quistis.

Selphie had been the first to accept him back, seeking him out two days after Squall had allowed him to return. She'd perched on his bed, just smiling as he scowled at her.

"You said you had wanted to know me a little better, so here's your chance, Seif!"

He wasn't sure which had made his jaw drop a little in surprise. The nickname or the fact that she had remembered that. Over time, she had gotten the others to see him for who he was not what he had been associated with. And had played matchmaker for he and Quistis. He owed a lot to her, which is why it hurt him so badly to see her as she was now.

**A month ago…**

It was to have been a routine mission. Quistis and Irvine had been picked by Squall to do the job. Quistis because she would be able to get close to the target and lure him into the open. Irvine would be the one to do the killing, as Balamb still only had a few snipers - all too green for a mission such as this.

But something had gone wrong. They still didn't what or by whom. The mission had been compromised and when Squall had ordered them out, they'd been killed. Squall heard it all on their two-way communicators and still had nightmares about it. Rinoa had been the one to break the news to Selphie and Seifer in private, since Squall had shut down. Even now, he was barely coming out of whatever place he'd gone into. Seifer had taken in well, he believed, even if a few mornings he woke up with a damp pillowcase. 

But Selphie… Sunshine, as he and Irvine had taken to calling her, was now a pale imitation of what she'd been. But he could understand. Irvine had been everything to her since the missile base. Willing to go along with all her schemes, helped play match-maker, always comforted her for any imagined wrong, calmed her down if she began to fret over things she couldn't control. In a lesser extent, Seifer tried to do what he could - as she'd dubbed him very best friend. 

And now, he watched over her as she had him in the beginning.

Zell came up to stand beside him, staring down at the dancing figure as well.

"She seems to have gotten better."

Seifer nodded. "Selphie's actually making plans for the garden festival this year… She was telling me about some ideas she'd had the other night…"

Zell tilted his head to the side, eyes moving from Selphie to look up at Seifer.

"That's good. It just wouldn't have been the same, if she doesn't do something…"

"I know."

They both looked up as lightning flashed across the sky.

"I'd better go bring her in, I'll see you later, Zell."

The other blonde nodded as Seifer left, shaking his head slightly. Seifer seemed to be the only one able to reach Selphie anymore, Squall believing she hated him for what had happened. Although the day after she'd found him and told him she didn't blame him, she loved him, they all did. At least, that's what Rinoa had told him. 

If Seifer hadn't found her, she would very likely be with Irvine and Quistis right now, wherever they were. 

_No more blood, I will be there for you my love  
I will stand by your side  
The world has forsaken my girl_

But he could understand why, Irvine had taken a shot meant for Selphie, in that final battle. Zell had been there with them. As he fell, she screamed, but unable to cast a life spell in time. Irvine faded away and she turned to Zell, casting a curaga on him instead, then fell to the next attack. She hadn't been able to continue without him. And as she faded away as well, he swore - to this day - she'd been smiling, whispering his name.

Seifer approached her slowly, the scent of rain becoming stronger. Selphie stopped spinning, turquoise gaze lifting, a smile spreading across her face.

"Seifer? Come to dance with me in the rain?"

He laughed, softly. Some things about her had never changed. In fact, during one storm, she'd dragged him outside to dance. 

"If you'd like to dance, m'lady."

Selphie grinned, dropping into a curtsy as he bowed. And though he knew he should be getting them both back inside - he instead took one of her hands, the other falling to rest at the small of her back. Her free hand rested on his hip and they began to waltz around the courtyard as the first drops began to fall. 

_I should have seen it would be this way  
I should have known from the start what she's up to  
When you've loved and you've lost someone close to you  
You know what it feels like to lose_

When the rain started to get heavy, Selphie pulled away for a moment. He took this to mean she wished to go inside, but before he could step back - she'd tugged him down and placed Irvine's hat atop his head. He blinked slightly as she wrapped her arms around his waist, cheek resting against his chest. He wrapped his coat around them both, some protection from the rain and they continued to dance.

"I'm so lucky to have you as a friend, Seifer. No one else would have done what you did for me…"

He shook his head. "They all would have."

"But you were the one who found me, Seifer. It was almost like you knew what I was going to do."

"I know how much you love Irvine, Selphie."

And how sometimes, even after he and Quistis had gotten together he wished it'd been him she cared for like that.

"I know…" She smiled again. "I was always telling you. I was waiting for the day you'd tell me just to shut up and to stop being so mushy. But you always listened to me. That's why I have to tell you something."

He nodded, waiting - but never paused in their dancing.

_She's fading away  
Away from thís world  
Drifting like a feather  
She's not like the other girls_

"I love you, Seifer."

Before he could say anything, she continued.

"I think part of me wanted to stay, to make sure you'd be alright. But you've been so much stronger then I have, you don't need me anymore. Instead, I need you. But I don't want it to be that way."

He sucked in a breath.

"You're asking me.. You want…"

"I want to be with him, Seifer. I feel as though a part of myself is missing…"

_She lives in the clouds  
And talks to the birds  
Hopeless little one  
She's not like the other girls I know_

"I'm not enough for you to stay? Your love for me isn't enough? My love for you?"

His eyes were burning, but he wasn't aware he was actually crying until he felt fingertips brush over his skin.

"If you leave me, Selphie… I'll be missing a part of myself too. I can't have both you and Quistis gone… I can't…."

_No more shame, she has felt too much pain, in her life  
In her mind she's repeating the words  
All the love you put out will return to you_

They had come to a stop and she stared up at him, then bowed her head.

"I'm being selfish, aren't I?"

"No, Selphie.. No. I am. It's just like you're floundering right now without Irvine; I'd be floundering without you. Just give it time, the pain will ease. It'll never be gone, but…."

"I know. I know that of us all, you'd know that best, Seifer… I'll. I'll stay. Besides… I don't think Irvine would be best pleased to see me. We'd made a promise to each other, you know.. If something happened to one of us, the other would continue on…. I just didn't think it would be so hard…"

"No one is stronger then you, Sunshine. No one. Not even me."

She glanced up again, shaking her head slightly and he just pulled her a little closer against himself, picking up the steps to their dance again. The rain had begun to fall softly - a sign, Seifer hoped. That all would be well.

_I should have seen it would be this way  
I should have known from the start what she's up to  
When you've loved and you've lost someone close to you  
You know what it feels like to lose_

She's fading away  
Away from thís world  
Drifting like a feather  
She's not like the other girls  
She lives in the clouds  
And talks to the birds  
Hopeless little one  
She's not like the other girls I know

---  
Disclaimers: Lyrics from 'Not Like The Other Girls' by the Rasmus. Characters used within belong to Squaresoft.  
Notes: Trying to be a little angsty and get myself back into Seifer/Selphie mode. Dunno if if worked. But, just let me know what you think and if you see anything that could use improving. ^^ 


End file.
